SAND, DIRT, AND PAW PRINTS.

bouncing.

2008-09-05T09:21:00.002-05:00

I started Weight Watchers in January. The end of January, to be exact. I lost around 27lbs and am now back to having just lost 20. I feel like I am slipping and losing my commitment to making myself a better being inside and out.

I need some motivation; a kick in the ass. I am going to switch to the Core program on Sunday which is basically their version of no processed foods dieting. I am excited and hopeful this will be the kickstart I need.

Something's gotta' give.

ps - I am sorry for not posting more. Life is busy. I also got married.

A Fond Farewell

2008-07-03T07:22:00.003-05:00

Rusty was surrendered to the shelter where I work when the family suffered a fire and lost their home. They were forced to move in to an already full house with a relative and their two golden retrievers could not come with. Rusty was 13, almost 14, and his brother was 6. Now, in shelter life, a surrendered 13 year old dog doesn't have much of a chance. Their adoption probability is in the single digits. Rusty had many health problems; kidney, strange lumps, and he was unable to get up off the floor of our offices without yelping in pain. He was old and it showed.

I knew, from experience, that his brother would be adopted in a heartbeat even with his food guarding issues. Rusty, on the other hand, was a gem who met and surpassed all temperament quotas. You could do anything to this dog. I asked our director to pleasepleaseplease let me "foster" him, knowing full well he'd never leave my house. I saw a spark in his cloudy eyes from the moment I had the pleasure of meeting him and he'd been invading my dreams at night. We have a tiny house on the beach with two gregarious dogs, one coming from a similar circumstance to Rusty's, and three cats. We had no room, but we could make room.

Rusty came home to us just after the new year. His mobility was an issue as we have steps leading up to our house and into the backyard so we carried him. Our wood floors were a challenge for him and the tile floor seemed like a vast expanse to his almost blind eyes; we bought him an area rug and hallway runners. The other dogs were more mobile and would accidentally knock him over while eating; we bought a baby gate. These things were never an inconvenience or an issue to us.

Rusty quickly became very attached to me and I to him. He was on many medications for his pain and we added some supplements of our own to help him get around. Our efforts were rewarded because shortly he was getting up and down without an issue, taking the stairs, and even on 2 brief encounters of him being excited to see me did he jump halfway up on the couch. He slept a lot, but loved a good scratch. He always greeted me at the door, stumbling to get up to be the "first" to see me, waggling his old tail and shoving his white face towards where he thought my hands would be. Some days he would bark, a hysterical version of "woob woob woob" in his deep old-man's voice. His nickname produced itself, "Woobie".

We battled with him and for him. One mysterious setback of him limping for a couple days, always drinking a lot of water due to his kidneys, and for a short period of time he refused to eat anything but rotisserie chicken. We loved him. We would sit on the floor of the living room with chicken and feed him by hand when we had to. We bought him cheese, chicken, ham, liverwurst, and so many canned foods I can't even begin to name them. We just wanted to do anything possible to keep his gentle, amazing soul with us.

He ate well, and once he was feeling better physically even went for walks every morning. He was enjoying life and we enjoyed him. We had the pleasure of taking him to the dog park a few times which he was thrilled with. Everyone there admired him and he knew it. His face was lit up like a christmas tree from all the attention he was getting. He trotted around the park visiting everyone and looked like a younger dog again. These were miraculous times to us; we thought, maybe, we might have him for another year or so.

We had him for five and a half months when he started having accidents in the house. He slept more than usual. A toenail just fell out of his paw on a walk. His water consumption went up. He no longer was interested in going for a walk in the morning. He refused to go down the back steps so we started taking him out the front door which was closer to the area rug where he slept. His appetite faded, he urine turned clear from his kidneys failing, and we knew it was time.

We had watched Walter cringe in pain from this same ailment and wished none of that intense discomfort on our friend. We knew it was coming to that point where he would be hurting more, past what his pain medication could tackle, and voted to let him go.

His last few nights with us, furthering cementing our decision, he would tell us occasionally that he was ready. He would bark randomly at me, as if to tell me something was very wrong. He didn't need to go out, eat, or drink. He really was just telling me he was ready. We spent the last night hovering over him on the floor and hugging him until his fur was soaked in our tears. You could tell he was sad also, laying his front legs in my lap and his head in my hands. "Just pet me and love me" was the message.

The day of was terrible. When the end was coming my beloved new old friend turned away from the people injecting him and laid his head in my lap. I put my face against him as I cried, whispering to him what a great dog was and that it was okay to go. I told him I loved him and that I would look for him when the time came. He sighed, as if to agree, and was gone.

I imagine my Ruby up wherever he is every day. He is playing like a young dog at the dog park, sidling up to every person there and turning around as if to say "scratch me right here by my tail, please". My grief is still very fresh and if I think about it too deeply I cry again.

Ruby would have been 14 in the beginning of June. I bond with all my dogs, but I fell hard and fast for this one like none before. He was what some call a "lifetime dog" with his only fault being that he couldn't live forever.

love you, woobie.

The Bite.

2007-12-21T22:21:00.001-05:00

The Bite.
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience

I was bitten at work. A bite to the face is probably the hardest, psychologically, to endure and recover from. This was no exception. I had nightmares for days. I am much better now and as you can see, I got very lucky in my healing.

I am blessed to have had this experience in that it has taught me that you can never be too safe around dogs; I am spreading the word. Even experienced dog handlers like myself can have accidents.

friends past.

2007-11-23T20:25:00.000-05:00

in memory of our friend walter who passed away this past tuesday.

you were a great dog, friend, and we will miss you very much.

xoxo.

turkey lurkey.

2007-11-23T20:23:00.001-05:00

we gathered together yesterday to count our blessings; each other, good abundant food, and many other blessings were celebrated.

meanwhile, yoda was thankful for any dropped turkey.

happy thanksgiving.

how yoda came to live with us.

2007-11-15T09:34:00.000-05:00

yoda was surrendered to the SPCA where i work by her owners. they had been evicted and could not take her, or her mother, with them. yoda is 13 and her mom, Princess, is 14. they had been outside dogs their whole lives so it was highly likely that they were not house trained, unsocial, and therefore plain unadoptable.

from the moment i saw yoda i loved her. her name was "fifi" and she would hide under the Kuranda beds at the shelter out of stress. she would wiggle out when i came to her kennel for a treat, then retreat back under. i would climb in with her and hug her while i fed her treats, visiting her as much as i could throughout the day because i know the kennel can be awful for a dog. i could see it was affecting her negatively.

then yoda fell ill. she has mucus coming from her nose, a cough, and she wasn't eating. she was put in ISO while the equivalent of kennel cough ravaged her. the vet techs at work stated, even in her medical records, that she was depressed, ill, and euthanasia was likely.

thankfully a volunteer at the shelter who runs Rescue Ridge decided that just because she was old didn't mean she had to die. i wholeheartedly concurred. it takes 5 signatures to put a dog to sleep at our shelter. there were 5 on her sheet. the volunteer simply asked to take the dog to see a vet at Red Bank Vet Hospital and get a second opinion. thank god - that second opinion saved her life.

yoda had pneumonia. she was put in critical care in an oxygen tent for two days. the morning after being admitted she started eating again.

fast forward to three weeks later; today. we are still on meds as her pneumonia slowly heals. we are slated for four more weeks of antibiotics, but she is slowly coming around. she gets spunkier every day. we are fostering her until her medical stuff is cleared, then we adopt.

the little old dog who "wasn't attached to humans" follows me around everywhere. she loves ear scratches, jerky treats, and going for walks. she never wants to be alone. it is as if she has been here for 10 years. realistically i know i won't have her that long, so the psychic feeling of already having had her here is satiating enough.

she doesn't have many teeth, has some hip problems, and is mostly deaf, but we love her.

apologies.

2007-11-15T09:09:00.000-05:00

i know many of you read this as a way to stay up to date on my life because i am horribly bad at the communications thing.

sorry, man.

since my last blog many things have happened. brye's 8th birthday came and went. my mom visited. we got a rescue dog that turned out to be a terror dog; then we got a dog from the spca where i work.

her story is a long one, so i will save it for the following post to give her the publicity she deserves.

dear vin,

2007-10-23T12:19:00.000-05:00

dear vin,

i know this may come as a shock to you because our relationship of adoring fangirl/famous person has been a strong one ever since i first saw pitch black, but it's over. a new man has taken over my spare thoughts and it is an urge i cannot repress. he has been in my top 5 for a long time; he is taking over your spot at #1. i hope you will be happy to know i still hold you as my #2 man.

hope there's no hard feelings.

xoxo,
me

errr, yeah.

2007-10-10T22:28:00.000-05:00

so more update:

the offered the job to ALL THREE finalists. we are now all 20 hours a week, blah blah. i have already been told that i should have received the manager's position, which i did not. i am an ass't manager to a volunteer dog walker who got the actual manager spot. it's okay, you can scoff; i did.

i am flying home to mn not this weekend but next(around the 21st). my grandmother is more or less in congestive heart failure and it's her 90th birthday. my mom said 'this is probably her last birthday so you should come home'. enough said.

i am also sick, which sucks. fuck you, viruses and your little eukaryotes and prokaryotes too.

awesome things.

2007-10-01T17:11:00.000-05:00

1. i made the final round of interview candidates for the adoption manager position at the spca. i meet with the executive director on wed. update will follow news. i will not be heartbroken if i do not get this; means i head to san fran as planned. if i do get offered this, well, a lot of plans will change.

2. audrey lost her first tooth! front tooth. she looks like a jack o'lantern, she tells me.

3. brye wants STAR WARS stuff for her birthday. how awesome is that? she will be 8 (very OMG moment here).

that is all. :)

MCSPCA

2007-09-21T11:45:00.000-05:00

today i was officially asked by the monmouth county spca to come interview for their adoption manager position next sunday. i am pretty stoked. i am also a little concerned that my going to SF will impede my getting this position (hello, leaving for 2 months after you've been there like 4-5 months?yikes). i am hoping they will see the benefit of my knowledge gained while at the academy rather than my GIANT ABSENCE as a huge difficulty for them.

we'll see.

baroo academy.

2007-09-14T10:01:00.001-05:00

so, i have come to the decision that i will bite the bullet and attend SFSPCA's dog trainer academy starting next april(if and when i get accepted to it). this means i will be living in SF for almost three months.

wow. i am pretty stoked. i have a lot of work to do.

you can read more about it here.

a shout-out to famous peoples.

2007-08-16T23:18:00.001-05:00

hey, you, josh woodward looking at my blog. HEY.

To all of you who, to your loss, do not know who Josh Woodward is, you can read and listen more here.

reasons we like josh:

1. he has gotten us through rough times.
2. he has TALENT.
3. he is INTERACTIVE. i IM'd him and he RESPONDED. omg.
4. he is part of the free and indie music movement. you can get all his stuff on his site, but you will love him so much you will BUY SOME. right? right. i will break your neck if you don't.

so, josh, HELLO. we love you. i love you. like a fat kid loves cake, or so i already told you.

advice.

2007-07-31T19:18:00.000-05:00

i wish people would stop asking me for advice. it's not that i mind giving it, mind you, nor am i always right. just mostly always.

but i do mind when they do not take my advice and whatever it was blows up in their face and they just "CANNOT BELIEVE THAT HAPPENED".

annoying.

sometimes.

2007-07-10T13:07:00.001-05:00

cherry sweat.
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience

sometimes when i eat cherries i like to pretend i'm one of the witches of eastwick.

I'm not a plastic bag.

2007-06-22T10:46:00.001-05:00

No, you're not. You are a fucking ridiculous "high fashion" version of the 99cent bags you can get in any grocery store. This disgusts me. This bag costs $15 while other reusable bags available for purchase at supermarkets are around $1 a piece.

Sadly, the message it sends is great - reduce, reuse, recycle - but not a dime of the profit goes to any organization working towards a cleaner earth. not a dime.

AND.. it's ugly.

our local A&P features waterproof bags made of recycled materials that display beautiful macro photography on the sides for 99 cents.

please read that last sentence again, or mostly just this part: made of recycled materials.

did i mention this bag these women are buying like crazy for $15 is NOT made of recycled materials?

yeah.

if you don't mind..

2007-06-12T13:35:00.000-05:00

well, yes, i do mind.

what do people think when they say, "if you don't mind me asking" after a personal question? it's almost always about money. do they think it gives them some sort of free pass to be a nosey bastard?

how will they take it when you say, "well, yes, i do mind", and then stare at them blankly. are you being rude by saying that to them or are you evening out the rudeness by doing that?

in any case, almost any time i hear that phrase i always say that i mind because i know that person is aware they are prying and i'd like to teach them to mind their own business.

even if i don't care that much about the subject matter.

someone get me a beer.

2007-06-06T17:26:00.001-05:00

someone get me a beer.
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience

can't wait.

this is the beach by our new house. when i say 'by', i mean 100ft from.

home ownahz.

2007-05-23T16:24:00.001-05:00

forgot to update y'all : house is ours!

beach, here we come!!!!!11

house!

2007-05-18T16:52:00.001-05:00

DSC07295
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

yesterday, chris and i went out with our realtor to look at houses. no dice. i sent our realtor a new list of houses last night - some of which don't have pictures on the listings or just a picture of the outside. we were wary of these due to those facts, but you never know what you're missing simply because of a picture.

today i went out alone with our realtor sheryl. we went out with the mindset of FINDING a house. we saw around 13 houses. we found one. it is adorable, light, and a stone's throw from the beach.

we are putting in an offer tonight. woo hoo!

druggie horse response:

2007-05-18T08:23:00.000-05:00

in case you miss the comments on any of these posts, there was one on my last "serious" entry regarding a book. here it is:

I don't even know you and I think you are a douche! I think there is something seriously wrong with you!!! You obviously have way too much time one your hands. Maybe you should put a little more effort into your children, instead of the crap you write. Your "housemate", does he contibute to the house you live in? Why do you talk about him as if fighting a war makes him not a part of the household anymore? How could he come home if he is in Iraq? Do you know what that is like? You are only able to type on your computer because he faught for us to have that freedom. If it wasn't for him, your wouldn't have the right to express your stupid blog's. Try treating him with a little respect!!!!

this person obviously totally knows what is going on to comment on this blog. and also has a lot of cajones to do so anonymously. i invite you to post back here again, anonymous person, with a real ID.

also, woo hoo for being famous enough to get a flamer. even if they are stupid and spell fought as "faught".

oh well, it's just another one of those "blog's", right?

druggie horses.

2007-05-17T08:22:00.000-05:00

i feel, quite strongly, that this is something you all should read. seriously.

47 days.

2007-05-16T08:24:00.001-05:00

it's official as of this morning - this fucking house is SOLD!!11111

thank god. now, to PACK.

worst of moods.

2007-05-08T18:31:00.000-05:00

i was in a foul mood today. the perils of manic depression - unpredictable mood swings.

poor chris. he came in with a fedex box in hand for me and in return i breathed fire and ice at him about the dog eating the futon. (i'd asked him to get rid of it weeks ago - the futon, that is)

anyway. while chris is heaving the futon out to the curb for fear of my head completely exploding atop my shoulders, i opened the box from fedex.

inside..was a mirror with a label on it.

"you're looking at a new D80 user!"

a free camera! omg. i totally got hooked up through an internet acquaintance. i am so STOKED. i get to use it FREE for a year and then get the option to buy at an editorial price.

so totally awesome.

thank you, person i have never met. thank you for admiring my work on flickr enough to offer me an opportunity to further my work even more.

xoxoxoxoxooooooooooooooooo.

(and chris thanks you for possibly saving his life)

nearly there.

2007-05-08T10:38:00.000-05:00

so, my term paper is finished and my portfolio is handed in. there are no major projects left for the semester. i am free of schoolwork (til the next semester).

now, this HOUSE. plz sell. we've had some promising people come to look at it - a builder's engineer stopped by today to get some specs on the property and whatnot.

so, whatever it is you do when you hope for something, can you hope a little for us?

Jack's turning ONE tomorrow!!!

2007-05-04T12:04:00.001-05:00

Jack's turning ONE tomorrow!!!
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

Us.

2007-05-03T12:42:00.001-05:00

Us.
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

here is a recent pic of us if you don't pop over to my flickr page(which you should).

strange dreams.

2007-05-03T12:40:00.000-05:00

last night i dreamed, among other crazy things, that my pubic hairs were composed of protractors and compasses. you know, the tools you use in geometry class. i was trying to figure out how to trim them with a beard trimmer and it wasn't working out so well.

if you know what this means, please drop me a line.

we have a new look.

2007-05-03T12:31:00.000-05:00

something lively and that reminds me of spring.

enjoy.

Hello, little ones.

2007-05-02T11:47:00.001-05:00

Hello, little ones.
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

Spring has technically been here for awhile, but it's finally showing itself the past week or so. Warm weather and blooms everywhere.

Bring on the summer!

wii scored.

2007-04-28T20:49:00.000-05:00

Highlights of my day include, in order of happening:

-seeing a drunk before 7am peeing, so drunk he had to lean against a wall, then peeing on his foot, then having to lift that foot. so a drunk against a wall peeing with one foot in the air
-talking to a crazy schizo
-Seeing Signourney Weaver
-Seeing Alan Rickman
-talking to a crazy schizo
-getting a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!
-having brunch w/awesome Consumators
-street fair/Union Square gardening expo stuff
-having my phone ring(ringtone:lady sov) IN A CHURCH. twice.
-having the voicemail be about a friend punching a girl in the box. "pow pow pow"
-a text that read "i just shit an anaconda."
-seeing a fat herm/tranny type singing to his discman on a street corner
-a bar full of aussies watching cricket
-playing my wii at home only to have my neurotic dog attack me, bite my ankles and calves, herd me, then leap up and bite my boob.

new toy.

2007-04-23T21:35:00.001-05:00

be6c_1_b
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

i love new toys.

a)

2007-04-18T09:45:00.000-05:00

the cats are back. they were a little shell shocked for a couple days, but they are back in good form now.

i cannot cannot cannot wait to get out of this house. i'm prepared to beg chris to accept ANY offer we get at this point so we can get out of here. seriously.

the non-divorce divorce.

2007-04-16T14:39:00.000-05:00

so, chris's housemate owns half the house with chris. he has slowly been moving his stuff out while we try to sell the house and move on. his current girlfriend has been coming and taking some of his stuff bit by bit. he, himself, hasn't actually set foot in this house since last august when he left for iraq. saturday he came back to get more stuff.

when he left, he took our cats with him. chris was home and let it happen. he doesn't even want them. he wanted to be spiteful and a jerk. it worked.

needless to say, after shouting and tears combined with a lot of phone calls and threats, my cats are coming home tonight.

they better. i miss them.

updated list of things jack has eaten.

2007-04-12T13:25:00.000-05:00

Old:

1 ottoman
1 arm chair
1 toddler bed mattress
3 rugs
6 pairs of shoes(12 shoes total)
1 pair of socks
1 shirt
2 grill covers
1 piece of bamboo fencing
1 pair of gloves

Adding:

1 futon mattress
1 more pair of shoes( nice heels)
3 BRAS. yes. bras.

sigh.

This is Basil.

2007-04-10T17:48:00.001-05:00

This is Basil.
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

Basil is at a shelter in Tinton Falls. He is a Basenji/Border Collie mix.

He is pretty rad. Jack is going to be in need of a new boyfriend, so we are on the prowl to find one. Basil might be it.

let's get topless.

2007-04-02T16:44:00.001-05:00

spring break officially started today for me.

squirrel arrives tomorrow.

let the party begin!

lou on the lam.

2007-03-31T20:26:00.000-05:00

we ran some errands today. one took us up in the neck of freehold to the mall to grab some stuff for a care package.

while traveling to this mall on the highway, we were nearing our destination's exit when i spotted something that struck fear into my heart.

coming off the 'on ramp' in the other direction were 2 greyhoundesque dogs, running down the highway at top speed. a golden retriever and a black lab were tearing down the road in traffic. i said to chris, 'oh my god, we have to turn around'.

turning around wasn't so easy, we had to exit, take a couple jug handles and sit through a couple lights. my heart was pounding the entire time. by the time we had resurfaced onto the highway there were at least 4 cars stopped and people out of them chasing these dogs. someone had gotten a hold on the golden, but the black lab was escaping rescue continually. he was running back up in the direction we had originally been headed, still on the highway. i said to chris, 'pull over!' i jumped out of the jeep and sprinted across the highway to the other side only to watch the black lab's rear end bounce up the highway. he was already back up where we had originally exited. do-gooders littered the highway, which was at a dead stop on that side. the black lab would have none of anyone who tried to call to him or grab him.

i sprinted about half a mile up toward where they'd all convened. i decided to lay back in case he escaped them. he did. he headed back towards me and past another lady on the original side they'd been running on -- cars were now coming from that direction. i hopped the median as he ran in my direction. i was now alone in this, the 15 other people including chris now behind him. i dodged the oncoming traffic and stood on the shoulder as he got closer and i whistled. i didn't yell or wave my arms, i simply stood still and held my arms up at my sides to make my body appear bigger, hoping to mentally trick him into stopping. it worked. he paused, put his ears up at my whistle, then decided that jumping the guard rail was his only option.

i could see from my position that it was a steep embankment, covered in brush where he had entered. i could also see that there was about 50 feet of fence now keeping him from the brush where he was tumbling through and another busy road that went under the highway. there was only one option.

i vaulted over the guard rail and ran down the embankment, slipping and sliding as i went. i curved my path around his, watching him the entire time as he stumbled through. i headed him off at the bottom where he pushed through a final bush and held my arms out as i had done on the road above us. i said nothing as i approached him slowly, him watching me. he slowed his movements and i gently said, 'down, down' while i kept motioning my palms to the ground. a miracle occurred and this unstoppable dog lowered his body and crawled toward me, exhausted and panting. i didn't know this dog, so i was unsure how he is going to react to me touching him. i quietly talked to him (i forget now what i said), and slowly reached out to him as he came within a foot away of me. i saw him give me a little lip, so i paused and let him come to me as i crouched before him -- no eye contact. i felt contact with his fur and slowly slipped my hand around his collar and recited, 'good boy. good boy. good boy.' he immediately laid down on his side, breathing heavy and foaming a little. i sat next to him on the hill and just gently stroked his fur as i caught my own breath. my heart was still pounding and i could feel his doing the same.

the owner magically appeared a couple minutes later, distraught and frantic. i called up to ask what her dog's name was as she repeatedly said 'thank god. thank god.'

turns out that lou and his golden buddy had slipped out the gate her son had left open in their backyard a few miles down the road.

did i mention i did all this in ballet flats? phew. someone get me a drink.

fo' sale.

2007-03-30T12:00:00.000-05:00

it's official, our house is on the market.

sell, motherfucker, sell.

i can't wait to get out of this place.

who?

2007-03-30T08:40:00.000-05:00

random IM:

[09:36] Noctothaqua: so, how are you lately? haven't talked to you in a while
[09:37] GOD DAMN LOLA: I am fine. I have no idea who you are.
[09:37] Noctothaqua: iceowl
[09:37] Noctothaqua: from consumating
[09:37] GOD DAMN LOLA: Still nothing.

again; who?

guest appearance.

2007-03-28T17:09:00.000-05:00

i am featured in the latest post of my friend lucia's blog.

check it out.

peace be with you, jersey.

2007-03-27T09:11:00.000-05:00

i have come to terms with the fact that i live in new jersey.

i don't mind the fact that in order to go left i have to go right first. i don't mind the fact that stoplights are an extra lifetime long. i don't mind that the express lane of the GSP is never express. i have become oblivious to the accents and fake orange nails. i have become to accept the fact that sometimes you have to drive 10 miles just to get onto the nearest major road southbound because there is no "south" entrance near the "north" exit.

however, let it be known that as long as i live in jersey i will not settle for living further than 5 miles from the beach.

jersey shore or none.

justice is mine.

2007-03-26T19:55:00.000-05:00

i got my photography midterm back today. the one my professor didn't tell us he was giving us on the day after i got back from boston completely exhausted and i was sure i bombed.

a-.

boo ya.

outernet.

2007-03-25T17:58:00.000-05:00

so i unplugged yesterday. no internet whatsoever. it felt pretty good. we went to see WARRANT last night at the stone pony. unfortunately, it was not as good as winger. not even close. they did play cherry pie, but not until the very end.

we did some spring cleaning/decluttering yesterday morning. the house looks much better. all the better to prepare for putting the house on the market.

we found a house today that chris is in love with. i like it a lot, too. it is immaculate. the only thing that needs to be done is to change the master bedroom and kitchen's paint colors(this awful sea foam green). the wood floors are spotless as is everything else. 2blks from the beach.

woo-hoo!

you has a flavor?

2007-03-23T14:46:00.001-05:00

mom, what are you doing?
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

if you haven't heard yet, there is a site called "I CAN HAZ CHEEZBURGER" that rules.

You may find it here.

and good news on the house - we might already have a person interested in it even before we've listed it.

he.

2007-03-22T12:02:00.000-05:00

sometimes he really pisses me off.

sometimes he drills holes in the bottoms of my plants because he feels they need "more drainage" at 7:30am.

sometimes he puts things away that even he can't find when looking for them afterward.

sometimes he does a bleach load and doesn't ask me if i have any whites i need done too.

sometimes he forgets things that are important.

but, sometimes he brings home egg drop soup just because. not because i asked for it, but because it is my favorite.

i love him because of things like that.

flat.

2007-03-19T13:29:00.000-05:00

my mood was really awful last week. over the weekend it really improved - mostly due to the fact that we are actively fixing the kitchen and putting the house on the market while looking for a new house. i am not happy here because brick is basically just a zip code for walmart. we saw 6-7 houses on sunday and got a good idea of what we liked and what we were looking for. we also narrowed it down to an area that we adore, keansburg, nj. right now they are in a 'rebuilding' era due to people ignoring it for the past 30 years, but moving here would be an investment for us as property prices are only going to go up with businesses moving in. we also met a woman we would consider making our realtor as she was very informative and nice despite not even working for us.

aaaaaand the mood was great until i got a flat tire on the way to school. fucking a.

sometimes you can't win.

monday, so far.

2007-03-12T14:48:00.000-05:00

the $2000 light* is illuminated on my dashboard. fuck.

my minolta's shutter is sticking and i lost about 15 pictures on a roll. have to get the cam fixed.

i burned up about 5 sheets of paper in the dark room because i am fucking exhausted & an idiot.

i got a $55 ticket in boston.

...and there was a "mid-term" today in class that he didn't tell us was going to happen. surprise.

to top it all off, i have to leave for class in 10 minutes and i read zero of the three readings we were supposed to it. maybe i'll get lucky and there'll be a test there also.

*check engine light
--------------------------------------

Updated:

late afternoon class cancelled. kind of a blessing. paper assigned due wed, though.

i may have to quit school after this semester and go back to work! yay.

i wish i were dead.

one big huge fuck-up.

2007-03-08T10:03:00.000-05:00

last monday i received a letter from the MA version of the IRS. i have already done my taxes and filed last month. this notice is to my address here in NJ, but the addressee is my ex-husband's name. i open it, wondering if they've screwed up his address somehow and want to make sure it gets to him in time. i can SEE his SSN up in the top right corner. so this is really weird...because that's not even close to my number (born in 2 different parts of the country, even).

the letter states that the 2006 tax forms that were filed were not signed and to sign this attached form and remit within 30 days or suffer a lessened return or an exalted tax bill. fine enough.

i call my ex to make sure it isn't him that needs to return this.

he hasn't even filed yet this year. this notice is for ME. so, i call the number listed on this notice and wait to speak to a rep. "Joe Downs", no lie, tells me that after looking up my SSN in his system he finds out that my ex's info is under my number. the one i haven't lived or filed with since 2004.

my ex's info, address and all, is under my social security number. what part of "security" does that exactly reassure me?

so now, i am being forced to fax a copy of my picture ID and SSN to prove i am who i say i am - major lols - even though "Joe" can see my previous years filings under my correctly name and whatnot.

happy fun times.

this is what i get for filing way ahead of schedule. fuck you, irs.

(and i called my ex back to tell him that his SSN might have my info and he better call to make sure it is straight asap)

let it snow.

2007-03-07T18:39:00.000-05:00

it snowed last night/today. we received about 2", tops. that was still enough for my school to cancel every class after 4pm. my only class today was at 4:40. i didn't shower because i had a feeling due to the snow that mumbles wouldn't be there anyway. silly. in minnesota this is unheard of.

i made a video today and put it up on youtube. it's pretty silly - the things i do when bored.

also, a random person named jesse found my blog via googling "splatter matter", which was kind of interesting. if you are still reading, jesse, welcome.

my dress that i ordered and had made for this saturday's event(The Men's Event in Boston) still ISN'T HERE. someone do something about that, okay? thanks.

enjoy the video, kids.

splatter matter.

2007-03-05T19:30:00.000-05:00

i love when you see a looooooooong streak of paint on a highway or country road that stretches on for at least 100 yards. i also love to see an obvious huge SPLATTER of it somewhere as if someone dropped an entire can of it.

it just makes me giggle to think that someone spilled all that paint.

i might be losing my mind.

day 2.

2007-03-02T12:31:00.000-05:00

day 2 of the yoga went off well, despite the hip lift maneuver making my left leg go "oh no you don't!" it did, but not before i promised it a piece of banana bread later.

lunch is delicious. baby spinach, vidalia onion dressing, wild skate sauteed in white wine, and a whole tomato sliced up and raw on the side. hardly any carbs. feels kind of good and it was DELICIOUS. did i say delicious? i mean delicious. mm mm.

last minute yesterday, i went for a job interview at an irish dive bar in neptune. i won't be brokenhearted if i don't get it, but it was kind of fun to go travel and see a scary part of the jersey shore............again.

my laptop crashed and burned last night. so long, days of watching DUN DUN* and perusing the web. sigh. dell's been alerted.

that's all from botsland today, folks. off to make banana bread.

*law & order

my newest blog fan.

2007-03-01T12:23:00.001-05:00

My newest blog fan.
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

welcome, anthony. thanks for reading.

so, yoga.

2007-03-01T11:41:00.000-05:00

i started yoga today. i am sure i'm doing it wrong for the most part, but it still kind of kicked my ass. i did not expect this.

awesome.

why mary anne.

2007-02-28T10:09:00.000-05:00

just to clarify, since i know so many people read this blog, the name has a little story.

i was 7 or 8, obsessed with listening to trini lopez on vinyl in my parents living room. he sang a version of 'mary ann' that i was in love with. from then on, i forced my parents to call me mary anne for at least 6 months. i would not respond if called by my given name.

so there you have it.

yum.

2007-02-26T22:15:00.000-05:00

things jack has eaten to date:

1 ottoman
1 armed chair
1 toddler bed mattress
3 rugs
6 pairs of shoes(12 shoes total)
1 pair of socks
1 shirt
2 grill covers
1 piece of bamboo fencing
1 pair of gloves

and every stuffed toy we've ever given him.

homophobic much?

2007-02-23T19:29:00.000-05:00

so i took bots jrs to wendy's for dinner as a little treat. they are very well behaved and self-aware when we are out to eat that it isn't time to pretend you are a monkey and screech while others are present.

that said, not everyone has taught their children this.

a woman with her son, who was around 8, and his friend were dining there. they were speaking loudly to another table next to them who were obviously acquaintances, so much so that the whole dining area could hear them. the little boys were shooting around the room and ..screeching like monkeys, you guessed it.

well, that's not why i'm writing this. i have come across ill-mannered young before, so i just avert my eyes and count my lucky stars mine aren't like that.

the son was showing off, as boys do, and introduced his friend to these people at the other table. then kissed the other boy on a cheek as a joke, really quick. they both laughed. and then..

the roar.

"AJ!! Get over here. Now." his mother is livid. "You don't kiss boys. You don't kiss any other boy besides your FATHER. EVER. GOT IT."

#1. it was obviously a joke. neither boy was offended.
#2. wow, way to raise a child who feels the freedom of expression all around him.

fortunately, they left before us, but not before i got to witness his darling mother* say, 'you girls ready?' to both boys while they put their coats on.

woo-boy. keep my kids the fuck away from ladies like that.

*mother with grown out too-light for her hair color highlights, an orange county choppers sweatshirt 2 sizes too big, UGGZ, and long, metallic rose colored fake nails. ew.

thee end. for now.

2007-02-23T13:20:00.000-05:00

the car, the jetta, is finally done. everything works. all lights go on when they are supposed to, AND OFF(very important).

trim piece that was missing is on.

thermostat is properly registering.

new cd player with xm is installed - weeeeeeee!

the car is perfect. finally.

now, who wants to go for a ride? i'll let you control the sunroof. maybe the radio, too. maybe.

oh, btw.

2007-02-22T15:29:00.000-05:00

put this on your list of reads.

predictions.

2007-02-22T14:35:00.000-05:00

i can't wait 'til we're 18 years down the road and anna nicole smith's daughter is doing her second stint in rehab.

maybe we'll get lucky and she'll pull a britney.

great project.

2007-02-21T09:19:00.000-05:00

a man named Danny Goldfield has come up with a project to take a picture of one child from every country in the world - without ever leaving NYC.

the photos so far, he has 136(58 to go), are striking. check it out.

with a face like this.

2007-02-20T13:00:00.001-05:00

awwwwwwwwwww
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

last night chris and i finally collapsed around midnight. exhausted from a day of running after kids, going to class, and whatever else. i don't sleep well, despite the kids being here, so when I was awakened at 2am to Odd screaming through the door that she had thrown up, i let out a desperate groan.

the girls both have some bug that is giving them a fever(i knew this prior) and we've been giving them tylenol as the fevers pop up, but. it has been awhile since i've had the night time call to arms to clean up puke out of a bed. it was like i'd never stopped. kid cleaned up, sheets ripped off and thrown in the wash, new sheets on, tucked in, and back to sleep in about 30 minutes. not bad.

it was the 5:40am crying of our stupid cat to be let into our room that woke up the dog to make him start barking that was the last straw. sigh.

i am also getting a cold, despite my organic barrier. it isn't bad, but it is enough to make me step a little bit slower.

a short list.

2007-02-18T19:22:00.000-05:00

1. i have decided to write my term paper on the benefits of eating organic, both health and economic/global wise. i already tell everyone i know how much better i feel since i started.

2. i am growing my hair out again. i miss my long hair. this short stuff is easy, but i miss my ponytail.

3. noxema is scary, intense stuff. just one application sent my skin into a tizzy that will take me a week to fix. damn you, sensitive skin.

4. i am hungry, so i'm going to go eat now. organic. :-)

5. i love my new car.

conversations with a budding genius.

2007-02-17T22:06:00.000-05:00

i drove to and from boston in the past 24 hours to get the girls for the week. we finally get back tonight to my house in jersey, and bird is SICK of the car. i am sick of the car, i feel her pain. we have to eat though, so we venture out. the conversation goes like this, as we see nearly everywhere is packed and there's a wait.

we pull into the TGIFriday's parking lot. packed.
"uhh.. how about somewhere else..", i say.
i drive through the best buy parking lot.
"how about best buy?", i ask as a joke.
bird says, "you can't eat at best buy."
"why not?"
"they don't have food."
"what, you can't digest paper?", i say.
"MoooOOOoom."
"how about the bookstore. you can digest a BOOK. hyuk hyuk", i say, earning no love.
"digest a book?", she asks.
"yeah, you know..absorb what it says...retain it in your memory."
"oh."

just trying to lighten the mood and tease her and odd a little bit.

so, we pull into outback and it is PACKED as is every other place on a saturday night. i groan, i am not waiting. too much driving - i just want to eat and go home and go to bed.

bird chirps, "hey, mom, we can go eat at KARATE", which is the title of a business within eyesight of outback.

"you can have a knuckle sandwich," she says smugly.

pwned by a 7 year old.

never.

2007-02-16T12:21:00.001-05:00

never send your vw to a ford dealer for repair.

ever.

trust me on this.

bumping pussies.

2007-02-15T22:31:00.000-05:00

no, rick, we're not.

that settles that.

oh, Pio.

2007-02-15T10:20:00.000-05:00

VodoBas (10:18:03 AM): Winter.
GOD DAMN LOLA (10:18:06 AM): Yes.
VodoBas (10:18:20 AM): You are used to it, though
VodoBas (10:18:23 AM): You are Norse and shit
VodoBas (10:18:30 AM): grew up in Middleheim
VodoBas (10:18:40 AM): Freja and Thor and what not
VodoBas (10:18:59 AM): but I'm of the furry people of the sea
VodoBas (10:19:09 AM): olive skinned and speaking with hands

Never fails to crack me up.

inspiration.

2007-02-15T09:15:00.000-05:00

where has my inspiration gone? i am days behind on my 365 Project and haven't really taken shots of anything else in the past week. i guess stress from money and other situations has just completely squashed my artistic eye.

so, do me a favor, if you are reading this please shoot me an email, an IM, a telepathic thought of creativity and possibly an idea. i used to have so many ideas of things to shoot and i feel like i am at a huge block.

online registration.

2007-02-12T19:12:00.000-05:00

dear college,

if you are going to offer this, at least make sure it fucking works. i have been trying to register for my sign language class for 45 minutes, toggling between my "campus cruiser" to change my pw, and back to the log in page to make sure it isn't me that is fucking up.

sadly, it is you. fix this shit before i can't get into this class -- which is the ONLY one of this class for the rest of the semester that only has 15 spots. 8 of these are already taken.

stop giving me hives, OCC.

sincerely,
me

ps- fucking set the clocks in the classrooms. i need to know just how long i have to suffer through prof ritchey and his mumbling each class period.

one more thing.

2007-02-08T16:43:00.000-05:00

i love you, kip winger. i swear i do.

the quest for knowledge.

2007-02-08T11:46:00.001-05:00

Project 365 - Day 129
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

While I was excited to go back to school, I was disheartened when I encountered my English professor. Thankfully, we have received a new book to read from that has some very interesting essays in it.

Our first assignment was The Prince, by Machiavelli. I read this one awhile ago, but it was good to read again. Machiavelli was advising the then ruler of Florence on the art of staying in power.

So, I guess the point of this is to say that while my professor seems inept at teaching, I am excited to reread some old goodies.

car troubles.

2007-02-07T11:48:00.000-05:00

our housemate is coming back from iraq early. this means i have no vehicle to get to class in. so.. we started to explore options for buying a car quick, craigslist was an obvious must. while i ended up purchasing a '98 Jetta yesterday, this doozy of an offer came into my inbox today:

(this was sent to more than just me, btw)

----------------

The car is still for sale...here are a few photos.

Exterior - Driver's Side http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/driverside.jpg

Exterior - Driver's Side http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/driverside2.jpg

Exterior - Front View http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/front.jpg

Exterior - Passenger's Side http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/passengerside.jpg

Exterior - Back End http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/backend.jpg

Interior - Front http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/inside.jpg

Interior - Driver & Passenger Seats http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/seats.jpg

Interior - Driver's Seat http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/driverseat.jpg

Interior - Back Seat http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/backseat.jpg

Interior - Back Seat http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/backseat2.jpg

Interior - Headliner http://members.aol.com/xvendettaxx/saturn/headliner.jpg

I bought the car with a pretty bad interior, and I've done my best to deal with/fix it. The Headliner needs to be replaced, I didn't have the money $$ to do it, but I had to do SOMETHING, so I went to Walmart and bought fabric...hah, it worked pretty well, but the straight pins don't stay in very well. Also, there are a couple cigarette burns around...I don't smoke, so the ones that "came with the car" are the only ones that are there. I've taken very good care of this car since I've bought it. I have almost, if not ALL of the repair sheets from when I'VE had the car...

I was slightly rearended in October 2006 (when I backed out of the parking space, a Woman in a Camaro wasn't paying attention and hit me in the center of the bumper), and the only damage was the back bumper & minor damage to the trunk...you can hardly tell...it's zip tied on, and I have no problems at all. The trunk is a little uneven from the hit, but it does not leak. I can take some more photos if needed. The mileage is almost 160k now...I bought the car at 147k, I think...and I've only used the car to drive back & forth to work (which was about an hour away).

I have put a head unit & 4 new speakers in the vehicle...I am askin for $1000 with it all. I have to re-wire the speakers & antennae...but, if you want to buy the car at $900 without the speakers and CDplayer, I think it would be pointless, haha.

My number is 609-312-****...and once again, my name is Amanda. Call for more information or to possibly set up a "test drive"...I live in Lindenwold, NJ...and I would be able to meet you somewhere if necessary...I LOVE driving this car, honestly...

OH, and I plan on getting the oil changed within the next week.

Thanks, Amanda

-------------

Well, thanks, Amanda, but I'll pass on this one.

secrecy for self-integrity

2007-02-02T16:43:00.001-05:00

Project 365 - Day 123
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

at what point do you stop being secretive and feeling like letting people in jeopardizes your integrity? i feel like keeping people out helps keep me self-preserved. i fear i will lose something if i let everyone see what i've got to offer.

there's so much i'd like to say, but instead i am silent. i don't, to a point, want to share. i'd rather be selfish and educated, than help someone else see the light.

is that wrong?

college at 27.

2007-01-31T21:37:00.001-05:00

DSC03576
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

i have come to the decision that my english class insults my intelligence. the kids in my class are obviously taking it for reasons similar to mine, a requirement towards a loftier goal. in our way is one thing, professor ritchey. he mumbles and he talks to himself instead of lecturing to us. we strain during the entire 75 minutes to hear what he's saying because he only speaks at a volume that the person directly next to him can really hear. he goes off on tangents about his wife, plays, or his schooling for 10-15-20 minutes sometimes. totally bizarre. he also sits the entire class. if we were in a lecture hall, it wouldn't be so bad, but we aren't.

he is the human equivalent of a tortoise. he even resembles one.

**thank you, stacy, for pointing out my "here" instead of "hear" in one sentence. i obviously need to be in this class.

a day well spent

2007-01-28T10:58:00.001-05:00

cap backwards.
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

yesterday was dreary and grey. normal people would get depressed over this, but not me. there are some sights that are best seen in this sort of weather. sights like the boardwalks, abandoned in the wintertime and completely desolate looking. i ended up shooting a bit at asbury park boardwalk, which is either completely torn down or close to it. eminent domain has taken over down by the water and blank spaces are everywhere. it is really sad. i googled asbury park to see if i could find pictures of what it used to be like - and it used to be glorious.

urban decay is so beautiful. i hate that the american way is to tear down the old and put new in. you forget your roots that way.

save our roots, people. they're all we've got.

Sometimes you just want to be anonymous.

2007-01-26T19:45:00.001-05:00

Project 365 - Day 117
Originally uploaded by bringonthescience.

there are a few pairs of jeans i am hanging onto i will never fit into again.

some that i don't want to. when i fit in them i wasn't eating and going through a really bad time.

others, well, happiness has brought back my appetite. :) time to hit the gym again.

either way, i am just uncomfortable in everything as of late.

a few things.

2007-01-26T14:06:00.000-05:00

yes, i haven't blogged in awhile.

san fran was awesome. jen was a great host and i really enjoyed it there. i wouldn't mind living there, but we all know donut isn't going anywhere anytime soon.

school started this past monday. the kids are idiots. i didn't really expect much else. uggz and fur trimmed parkas galore. oh well.

tomorrow we are supposed to go to ellis island. i've never seen the statue before, so hopefully it will be nice out so i can get some good pictures.

more boring blog post ever.

nyc birthday party

2007-01-13T11:13:00.000-05:00

technically, my birthday isn't until next Wednesday, but i had a party last night in NYC with friends.

a great party. pleasantly drunk, lots of laughs, and some dancing on the bar.

can't ask for any more than that, can you.

oprah and evil

2007-01-11T18:33:00.000-05:00

is oprah really that evil? i mean, i really can't think of anyone or thing she has really hurt in her climb to fame and fortune. she is a totally rich black woman, which was unheard of, really, even 50 years ago.

i like her book club. i do not know if oprah is the sole book selector in the deal, but the books and authors chosen are often quite good. if anything, i see oprah as a way to get the public to read more. anything, in all honesty, that gets people to read more is totally supported by me. midamerican housewives are gullible and easily influenced, why not influence them into reading?

oprah brings to light a lot of authors that the public otherwise may not get to see or hear about.

so, i guess i don't see the bad part?

7 months

2007-01-10T10:48:00.000-05:00

today, 7 months.

sometimes i wonder how i got this far without killing him and sometimes i wonder how i am still alive.

the road is rocky, but it is mostly rocky road.. if you know what i mean.

get you some action.

2007-01-09T08:51:00.000-05:00

you hear, many times, that actions speak louder than words. well, they say this for a reason. think of all the situations it could apply to.

politics: 'we will disarm.' this doesn't mean shit until your guns are gone.
religion: 'believe in me and you will have eternal life.' and again, i'll believe it when i see it.
love: 'i love you.' ....

that's what this is about. the i love you. the ILY means so much more in action, but why is it so hard to say? we choke and sputter on those three little words we use endlessly in other situations, but when it comes to that one person there is a huge mental block. very odd. sometimes mutual love between romantic partners is understood far before the energy to proclaim the words aloud can even be mustered.

why is this? does that make it official...and reverse of all other "actions speak louder" situations? it is befuddling, to say the least.

once the ILY is said, mutually or singularly, it should never, ever become a common phrase, in my book. if you say something a thousand times, it loses its meaning. it has a certain seriousness and effectiveness when a rarity that it won't have with familiarity.

if you say "come. come............come...come.." to a dog who refuses to come to you, he begins to think the word is just background noise.

i do not anyone, ever, to think my ILY is background noise. i want them to hear it like thunder.

armand

2007-01-08T14:46:00.000-05:00

dear armand.

mr van helden, i should say.

have my babies, please.

can we do it to your remix of 'sexyback'? maybe 'touch your toes'?

please write back.

love,
me

ears of tears

2007-01-08T14:44:00.000-05:00

this is the first time i have ever woken up from a sleep to discover i'd been sobbing.

while asleep.

this is kind of an intense discovery and occurrence. i really hope it never happens again.

i also hope i never dream of what i dreamed of to make me cry that way while unconscious even.

i imagine this is what happens to severely depressed people, although it has never happened to me before even in the depths of despair.

damn you, xm and your BPM too.

2007-01-05T13:44:00.000-05:00

i cannot stop listening to bpm on xm radio. electronica/house/techno whatever. the last downloads of "gently borrowed music" i have off limewire are as follows:

Cicada - The things you say(Dirty South Remix)
Gorillaz - DARE(Dave Aude Club Mix)
Hellogoodbye - Here in Your Arms
September - Satellites
Supafly, Inc - Moving Too Fast

i will stop embarrassing myself now. but, if you have time, DL those(and of course if you like that sort of music).

and also, for hilarity purposes, please look up 50 Cent's remix of London Bridges(by Fergie). It is so horrifically bad that it will make you cry with laughter.

trust me.

the advent is near.

2007-01-04T16:06:00.000-05:00

I am nearly 27 years old. Now, if I were a dog, I'd be dead. In some instances, I would tell you that I'd already lived a whole life, which is mostly true. I've gone to college, been married, divorced, had kids, owned a home, a dog, and a car. This factor used to be my excuse for refusing to interact in what other people my age partake in. I just didn't have it in me. Not to mention the fact that 98% of people my age sicken me..but that's for another time.

Something has changed.

I'm going back to school. I'm trying to direct my life in a path that I agree with, not necessarily what's been set in front of me. There are things I want to do and see. Things I want to take pictures of, people I want to hug, and wines to try I've never even heard of.

So, 27, I am expecting a lot from you. I expect you to produce that spark I thought I'd lost. Help me dust off my shoulders, shield me from the deterrence of thought-up failure, and point me in the direction of the nearest freshly baked pie.

no strawberry, thanks.